This IVF cycle made possible by....

We are not one of the lucky ones with insurance coverage that will pay for IVF.  Our insurance has covered some of the preliminary work at a discount but stops at IVF and medication coverage.  We are fortunate to have been able to easily find financing the two previous times -- the first was through a very generous line of credit through Wells Fargo bank.  It was one time where having a really good credit score paid off tremendously!  The second time we were able to fund ourselves through a patchwork of HSA accounts, credit cards, and bonus money.  It was a little more complicated but we made it work.

We are fortunate this time to have someone close to us lend us the money outright.  Using a contract that includes a generous repayment plan for us and a modest interest rate for him, we are able to make our pre-payment (with some leftover) without any worries at all.  For the difference, we have been lucky to have had enough time and ability to put aside the money.

I know many people desiring IVF are not so lucky.  I am very grateful that this part of IVF has been fairly easy and without a lot of worry or stress.  So thank you to our kind benefactor....your generosity is appreciated beyond words.  Rather than being a large boulder in the way, you've made it possible for it to be a very tiny bump.

IVF in the news

Yesterday there was an article in the New York Times regarding a very serious complication of IVF called Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome (OHSS).  (The most famous recent example I can think of is when Giuliana Rancic did IVF. She unfortunately ended up with this condition and had to be hospitalized.) 

According to the article, there is some debate about the high level of medications used in some IVF cycles and whether or not they are needed to have a successful cycle.  This article intrigued me because my particular protocol, designed by my doctor, is very medication heavy.  It requires high doses of stimulation meds and very fine tuned doses of suppression medications. 

While this concerns me, especially since I ended up with so many follicles the last time (22!), I trust my doctors and the monitoring they do.  At the height of my cycle, I will be making clinic visits nearly every other day.  At these visits, I will have blood drawn and an ultrasound done to check my progress.  Based on these two tests, my doctor will determine if my medications need to be adjusted (they frequently are).

I would advise anybody considering IVF to do their homework very carefully.  While it's important to trust your doctor, it is also important to be educated, and ask questions.  The low dose method of IVF that is described in this article would not be appropriate for me, but it may appropriate for you.

One last chance

No one aspires to do IVF; at least no one I've come across in all my years of fertility treatments.  It's expensive, painful (emotionally and physically), and down right draining.

Those of us that are facing IVF, whether for the first time or like me, a third time, always hope for that one little miracle.  That surprise pregnancy that means IVF isn't needed.  We've all heard of those people; the ones that tried and tried for years and years, only to stop or take a break and suddenly find themselves pregnant.  I've known a few of these people in my life and of course wished to be one of them.

Given that both my husband and I have fertility issues, I'm fully aware that the odds are very much against me.  To be one of these people, I have one more shot at it.  One more cycle before it all begins again.  One last chance for Mother Nature to cooperate.

You really can Youtube anything

You know the old saying, if you want to learn how to do something, go look on Youtube!  There are thousands, if not millions of how-to videos.  Wanna learn how to put on make-up?  There's a Youtube video for that!  Wanna learn how to French braid your hair? There's a Youtube video for that!  And yes, if you want to learn how to give yourself your IVF meds, there's a Youtube video for that as well.

Initially I had planned on taking my clinic's shot teaching class.  It's been several years since my last IVF cycle and I felt a little rusty on the ins and outs of correctly administering the shots.  Given how much is at stake, I didn't want to take any chances of screwing it up.  When talking to the IVF nurse, she was surprised that I wanted to take the class.  She understood but also suggested I could just watch a Youtube video on it.  This week I decided to take a gander myself and see what was out there.  After all, what could it hurt?  And I could save myself another trip to the clinic (each trip is at least 25 minutes each way).

So off I went in search of any videos.  I stumbled upon a couple of really good ones done by a nurse at a fairly well known reproductive medicine clinic.  I have posted the links below in case you are curious.

Subcutaneous shot   Intramuscular shot

As I watched the short videos, it all came back to me and I found myself nodding along, the scenes all too familiar.  Here I thought I had forgotten, but no, the information was stored in the part of my brain that stores the rest of my IVF memories; the things I can rattle off with almost no effort at all.  The upside?  I don't have to make that extra trip to the clinic any more.  I am confident in a way I didn't think possible that I won't screw it up.  I can do this again; the memories are there.  The strength is there.  Right where I left it.

All systems go!

This morning I completed the next step in the process before we officially launch our IVF cycle -- the saline infused sonogram.  A lovely sonographer, Heather, came and got me from the waiting area and actually remembered me from the last time I was there!  She's very kind and gentle which puts me right at ease given what I know she has to do.  Everything looks great; no surprises at all.  The doctor was very satisfied with the state of my uterus and how my ovaries looked.

The doctor also gave me the results of my blood work, specifically the Ovarian Assessment Report.  If you remember, this particular blood test is new to my clinic and is used to evaluate my chances for a successful egg retrieval.  It's a more involved hormone panel than I've ever previously done so I was interested to see the results.  It confirmed for the doctor that I do indeed have Diminished Ovarian Reserve.  Previously the doctor believed that I may not have this condition because there was no solid proof to back it up, only situational experience.  However, this test left no doubt that this is indeed one of the reasons I cannot conceive on my own. 

The test revealed that I do not have as many eggs as I should for my age.  While it sounds discouraging, it only  means that the medication protocol that the doctor is putting me on is right on.  This is a medication heavy cycle, and they will stimulate the heck out of my ovaries to ensure a good response and a good number of eggs.  The good news from all of this is that even though there is no test for egg quality yet, because I have been able to deliver healthy babies my egg quality is just fine.

So all systems are a go! Our next appointment at the clinic is August 10th with the nurse.  There we will sign our consent forms and make our pre-payment in addition to reviewing any last minute details or paperwork.

Happy Father's Day!

Since the burden of fertility treatments falls mainly on women, it is easy to forget the men that are involved in this process.  After all, we can't really do it without them, can we?  Even if you're doing this as a single woman or as a woman in a same-sex relationship, you still need the male half of the equation.

So to all the men out there -- regardless if you're providing just sperm or are an active participant in the entire process from start to finish -- Happy Father's Day!  Even though your role is much smaller, you are just as important.

Re-defining what's normal

Thinking back on how families used to be built "in the old days" makes me realize that it's time to re-define what's normal.  It used to be that a man and a woman met, fell in love, got married, and then had children.  And up until the last 50 years or so, it was assumed that a woman would stay home with the children while the man worked to support his family.

Now, it's not so simple.  Children now come into this world and into families in a large variety of ways.  Women are waiting longer to have children or not having them at all or having them alone.  Children are being conceived and raised in same-sex households.  More families are made up of adoptive children from all over the world.  There are blended families made up of step-children; cousins are treated and loved as brothers and sisters.  There are more mixed-race families.  Fertility treatments are widely used and accepted so that many more loving people can become parents.

This has forced our society to re-define what's normal when it comes to building families.  I used to pine for the old normal and I grieved for the old normal when it came time to begin fertility treatments.  But eventually I was able to embrace the new normal and appreciate the family it's given me.  Not just my own two (and hopefully 3 next year) children but the extended family that I've been blessed with.

So let's embrace the new normal or create our own version of normal, not because we're forced to, but because we want to.