Monday, April 1, 2013

April Fools' Day

I've never been a fan of April Fools' Day.  I'm not a prankster by nature and I hate having them played on me.  But I'm not about to ruin anyone else's fun so I always kept the secret or when called upon helped in a prank.  As long as I wasn't the victim (and the prank seemed funny), I thought it was all harmless fun.

That is until I started suffering from infertility.  After all, for women of a certain age, playing the old positive pregnancy test prank is a classic one.  It's easy to do, and if you're a good enough actress can be a really convincing one.  It requires no props unless you want to be really convincing and borrow a real test from a pregnant friend; just the words to shock whatever person you're trying to fool like the unsuspecting spouse/significant other, friend, or family member.

As time went on, this prank, instead of funny, became increasingly painful.  And after years of trying, I started to wonder what would happen if I actually did find out I was pregnant on April 1st.  Would anyone believe me?  Would anyone share in my hard won joy?  Or would they all think it was a prank I was playing?  It was an awful feeling.  Even though I'm relatively a private person, there was a small group of people I was counting on to celebrate with me in that moment.

It also opened my eyes to those around me also suffering from infertility.  I saw how that prank may have caused them pain in the past and it really sealed it for me that I would no longer be a part of it, nor find joy in it.  It was no longer harmless fun.  Instead I would prefer to support my friends in their struggles on this day, just like any other day.  And that is no joke....

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